Great, the question I wasn’t looking forward to answering.
Without going into serious detail, I was at my worst. I was in my deepest pit of depression thus far. It was an option as a way out. A way out of feeling so terribly miserable all the time. Feeling so hollow and broken. I wasn’t myself, just a shell of what I used to be. Recalling the way I felt is bringing tears to my eyes. That familiar sting is still there when I talk about it.
I’m always fighting depression and stress. It’s a common problem among people. But it’s a war. Ask anyone you know who’s fought it. Sometimes I’ll trip and fall back down, but I get up. That’s what matters.
I’ve thought about (and possibly attempted) suicide. A lot of people have. But the fact is, I remained, not always strong admittedly, but alive. My will to live was stronger than my desire to die.
Suicide may always be a thought, but I will never end my own life. I know that now. No matter how bad things get, a stubborn person like me isn’t pushed around by anything. Not even depression. As sad and hapless as I may sound sometimes, I’m fortunate, (mostly) happy and I’ll always find a way to smile or get up eventually. Always! :)
